going back to camen highland

well at fist i want to go to camen highland, after the few day i don't want to go to carmen highland the felling in pulling me and push me is like wanted to go don't wanted to go.
tuesday i went to help my mom,in the car my dad is saying that he trust my brother more then me it make me less important. well it did not hurt me fist, well i prentent that he did not say that the. second time he say that it really hurt me it like getting shoot from a gun.

i am angry i did not show that i am angry, i thought my emontion is in control that remind me about wat tim did with his mother in the car it kept reminding me. then question come up to me what do you thing tim should do? i say well tim should control his anger. the last day we all go to the mountain i claim up that mountian my dad wanted to take a picture with me outside it look like we have a close relationship but inside i wanted to push my dad away

when we all going back home to take my brother to go to diner, when my parents started talk to my brother. i fell like i being put into the box, i was felling sad and angry. after the dinner me and my brother going back home.
my dad going to take my sister, my sister read my sms. she got worry when my sister come back she ask me what are you doing with tim, i got so scarde because i don't want to tell my sister what happend i don't want them to judge me.
i pretend to be strong saying, we did nothing but deep down i am afriad. my sister asking again and again i kept on saying nothing she don't believe i got angry and say this is my business none of yours so left me alone.

she was so compassion saying this, you are my brother how can't i care about you? i don't want to talk about the problem, so i go to my room playing guitar. she kept on asking me and i kept on playing guitar. then my father jump in, and i got even more angry, so i rise my voice hopeping that they will stoping asking.
but my dad kept asking, and then i got more angry. my brother come to me, and asking wat wrong my sister told him what wrong. so i say to my dad, you are compare me with my brother.

my brother saying to me that no buddy is compare you, i got so angry and say yes. my brother say i was like we will believe you, i say we just want to play play. then everbody left the room, my father talk to me he say that if you become parents then you will understand.
then my mother wass understand my pain, she say that i love you all if you did not find job is ok you can help me and the hole thing start silent.

then God remind me the verse 1 cor 13 it kept on remind me love does not boast love don't need to prove youseft that you are worth enough. you don't need to prove everything you parent love just the way you are and God stated to heal me